For today I get an F for #FAIL

  Well today I actually hit A$$h*le status. After being awake for 16 hours straight, now 26 hours straight because I could absolutely not get to sleep last night (I really have to work on my sleep schedule, I am like a lazy college kid who scheduled their classes after 1pm). I went to a taping of the Rachael Ray Show!! Yayy!! Really fun experience but not at all what I was expecting. Well while there with my Mom she tells the stand-up comic/audience coordinator, whatever that I am a Off-Off Broadway Singer. I don't know why but that term Off-Off embarrasses me, I guess because really you could say any hole in the wall theatre type place in NYC is Off-Off to me it's still not good enough because I am not getting paid. Anyway he's like "oh you're a singer? This is happening" I completely brush it off because he's obviously just humouring my Mom. Wrong! After talking to everyone in the audience including me plugging in my Off-Off Broadway Appearance this weekend he says "so you have a little tune in you?" It really was so surreal that I did not know what to sing! (Mind you this isn't taped it's just him keeping the audience entertained but Rachael is there and very much present) First of all I didn't look my best, my hair looked like I was riding on a tilt-a-whirl, then me, a girl who's been doing Musical Theatre for 10 years now, and has done dozens upon dozens of 16 bars...this is what I sang in what sounded in my head like a baritone..."Start spreading the news...We're here at Rachael Ray" and that's it I gave him the mic back. If that isn't a F in the big book of opportunity I don't know what is and I am so pissed. I mean I am not saying if she heard me (how I really perform) she would take me backstage and get me on Broadway but at least I might get a mention. I mean I didn't sound bad don't get me wrong. Bad is the time I went and stood in the herd of cattle waiting to sing or not sing in my case to audition for Spiderman...THAT was beyond Fail. But this,today, a definite F. I guess today just wasn't my moment...and I will have to move on just like I would any other audition...but still I can't help but feel shame on myself as an actress... I'm going to walk the plank...